Rediscovering Strength: Annette and DJ’s Journey of Healing
Annette never imagined she would be raising another child at this stage in her life. A longtime educator and a woman of deep faith, she had poured her heart into raising her children, guiding students in her classroom, and serving her community. But when her grandson, DJ, needed a stable home, there was no question—she would step in.
From the moment DJ was born, Annette took on the role of his primary caregiver. She watched him grow, saw his early brilliance, and marveled at his quickness. But as he got older, his struggles became more apparent. School after school, he faced challenges with authority, impulse control, and emotional regulation. There were countless moments of anger, frustration, and heartbreak. Annette tried everything she knew to help him, but peace remained out of reach—for both of them.
Then, she found Chosen.
At first, she wasn’t sure what to expect.
Would this really be any different from the countless other interventions she had tried? But from her first session with Alejandra, Annette felt something different. It wasn’t just the advice offered—it was the way Alejandra listened.
She wasn’t there to tell Annette everything she was doing wrong. She was there to understand, to support, and to walk alongside her. And with each conversation, Annette began to see that maybe there were new ways to approach DJ’s behaviors—ways that didn’t rely on stricter discipline or louder commands but instead leaned into connection.
One of the biggest changes came in how Annette responded to DJ’s outbursts. Annette recalled learning from Alejandra: “When you’re both in a heightened state, you can’t think logically”. So if he started yelling at her, she would walk away, take a deep breath, and get a glass of water. And she saw it—she saw the difference.
The change wasn’t immediate. DJ was strong-willed, intelligent, and, at times, defiant. But the way Annette engaged with him shifted. She started to prioritize connection before correction, and slowly, DJ responded. The little moments of progress became monumental victories.
One day, DJ cleaned his room—something that had been a constant battle for years. “He actually called me in to see it,” Annette said. “He was proud of it. That was huge. Before, there was always so much resistance. But now? Now he wanted me to see his accomplishment.”
And then, there were the words Annette had waited fourteen years to hear.
“For the first time since I’ve been working with Chosen, he told me, ‘I love you, Grandma.’” Annette’s voice softened as she said it, the weight of those words still fresh. “I’ve never gotten that from him before. Never. And I don’t know if he realizes how much that meant to me.”
These weren’t just small changes—they were signs of a new foundation being built between them.
DJ was still growing, still learning, and still struggling at times, but there was hope where there had once been only exhaustion. Annette, too, felt the shift.
“I’m at peace,” she said simply. “For years, I carried this weight—this feeling that I was failing him, that no matter what I did, it wasn’t enough. But Chosen has given me tools, and more than that, they’ve given me confidence. I know I can do this.”
For a boy who had spent so much of his life battling against the world, the love and patience of his grandmother—reinforced by the guidance of Chosen—was making an impact. And for Annette, the journey forward was no longer one she had to navigate alone. She had found a partner in Chosen, and through that partnership, she had rediscovered her own strength.
With every session, every lesson learned, and every moment of connection, Annette and DJ are writing a new story—one built on hope, healing, and the quiet but mighty power of love.
Chosen Walks Alongside the Caregivers
Every year, Chosen helps hundreds of adoptive families build bonds of trust. And we’re looking for partners to help heal their heartbreak. Your gift gives families the assurance they need to provide attachment and permanency for kids who desperately need it.
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