Chosen Stories
4 May 2023

Dykstra Story

Chosen - Adoption | Foster & Orphan Care Outreach | Mentoring

Adam and Taylor’s story: Creating Connections That Will Last a Lifetime 

Every child deserves to be part of a thriving family. But for hundreds of thousands of youth suffering from childhood trauma, there’s simply no place to call home. These children are raw from the wounds of abuse and neglect — and they’re desperate. Desperate for love. Desperate for support. Desperate for the security of a loving home. 

So when Adam and Taylor* felt called to open their home to vulnerable children, they couldn’t wait to start. The couple had a lot of love to give, and they were eager to make a difference in the lives of hurting children. 

What they didn’t know was just how much their own lives would be transformed in the process. 


“We thought it would be like babysitting” 

 

From the start of their relationship, Adam and Taylor felt called to open their home to vulnerable children. They initially discussed adoption. But then many of their friends became licensed to foster, and they realized foster care was an equally important opportunity to carry out God’s purpose in their lives.    

Four years into their marriage, the couple began to research the child welfare system, looking for agencies and mentally preparing themselves for the journey ahead. By the time two young sisters showed up at their door, they were elated.  

As Taylor later recalled: “We thought it would be like babysitting!”

It didn’t take long for she and Adam to realize they weren’t nearly as equipped for the challenges of fostering as they had originally thought. There were tears and struggles as the reality of a 24/7 commitment to fostering set in. Still, they stuck with it and began to bond with the girls. They made progress and developed a rhythm in their new life as a foster family.  

Then COVID-19 hit.  

As pandemic shutdowns and school closings were announced, Adam and Taylor panicked. How would they continue to build a relationship with the girls in the midst of economic uncertainty and remote learning? Who could they lean on when every business and church was closed? The couple turned to God, knowing only He could get them through this.  

That was when they found Chosen.    


Learning what it really means to create connections  

 

Unlike many nonprofit organizations that focus on placements and paperwork, Chosen specializes in helping foster families heal from trauma. Care managers use proven practices and deep clinical expertise to equip foster parents and children with the tools they need to thrive.  

So when Adam and Taylor started meeting with a Chosen care manager, their whole world changed. 

“We began to see the effects of the trauma that the girls had experienced and understood that we needed trauma-informed education,” says Adam. “Chosen helped us understand our own backgrounds and how we could use that understanding to establish a healthy attachment to the girls.” 

The couples’ appetite for information grew, and they soon spent many evenings pouring over resources and putting their personalized action plan to work. Through their work with Chosen, Adam and Taylor realized they had to put in the time to gain the trust of their foster daughters, and they learned that success is built on the relational aspect of parenting.   

“Before Chosen, the girls were always having to come to us,” says Taylor. “It was never us coming to their level and saying, ‘I care about you.”

Open dialogue with their Chosen care manager allowed Adam and Taylor to restore peace in their home and establish a close bond with the girls. They began to feel confident and connected with their children and, over time, became masters in discipleship for parenting.  

Ultimately, Adam and Taylor learned that their work with the welfare agency was just the first step. Agencies provide a valuable service — they connect loving foster parents to children in need and provide critical legal support. But it was in Chosen the couple received real heart help in the form of actionable tools for long-term success.   


If Adam and Taylor’s story sounds familiar, we have good news: 

While struggles may be inevitable once you’ve been touched by a child in the welfare system, you don’t have to go through it alone. Chosen is here to walk alongside you on this journey with the support, tools and resources you need to heal hearts and create connections.  If you’re looking for help, you can get started today. 

*Names have been changed. 


Every year, Chosen helps hundreds of foster and adoptive families thrive. And we’re looking for partners to help heal their heartbreak. Your gift gives families the assurance they need to provide attachment and permanency for kids who desperately need it. Give now to help a family today.